Saturday, January 12, 2008

Icy Blue

Well first off I am very happy to announce the arrival of af a couple of days ago. I have been very upset that she decided to take an extra long vacation. Rest at ease though, we have talked it out and come to a compromise and all is well again. Well cept for that whole red sea thing and all.

Other than that not much to report. I'm struggling very hard with what I assume is a hefty bout of depression right now. I've lost my appetite (which is very hard to do when af is around) and sleep is just not wanting to show itself. Usually the week before af I get this severe fatigue that I should probably bring to the attention of my doc but I figure he has enough of me to deal with at the moment. I wouldn't want to work him too hard what with his underpaid pitiful overworked self (half days on Tuesdays and Thursdays hmph!). Anyway, since going back to school my schedule has just become a nightmare and I can't sleep for more than about four hours at a time. By about one in the afternoon I am so tired I want to cry but once home I can't go to sleep for very long.

There are lots of other things going on in my head too. I feel like it is just a constant swirling cyclone up there of thoughts and fears and frustrations. I'm sure this will get better. It is just something I need to work through and allow myself time to deal with but it sucks! If I had the time I would hunt up a new doc but for now I'm just going to do my best to muddle through.

Have you ever noticed that you get so wrapped up with your gyn or re and you spend so much time and effort ttc that you forget about your health in other areas? I feel like I am at the doctor's all the time but truth be told I haven't been to one in a couple of years other than my gyn.

Sorry I'm sort of all over the place but at the moment that's just how my brain is.

We had our 5th year anniversary on Tuesday. I started back to work that day so the main gist of it was "Hey hon, Happy Anniversary, have a good day at work!" "Yeah you too!" and that was that. So much for reflection and all the mushy stuff huh? That's ok. We have Sunday I suppose.

Anyway, hope your weekend is great!

1 comment:

Road Blocks and Roller Coasters said...

I'm sorry to hear that AF showed and that you're in a funk. Perhaps it is just the craziness of your life at the moment, but whatever it is I hope it passes soon.

Happy Anniversary! :)